Gone are the days when people got stuck under patriarchal norms and pertained to the general stigma of ignoring their mental health. People are now prioritising their mental health. Though mental health has gained all the limelight, couple counselling is still a stigma in modern society. A couple is expected to make it on their own. Taking help from external factors like couple counselling or therapy is a great decision as it will help you to enhance your relationship. Acknowledging the problem is the first step to cure the issue from the roots. First of all, you need to acknowledge that you and your partner need couple counselling. Here are a few signs that are an indication that you and your partner need couple therapy.
Lack Of Intimacy In The Relationship
Lack of intimacy is one of the few initial signs of a degrading romantic relationship by either or both partners. It is common for your sex life to wind down a bit if you are in a relationship for a longer period but a substantial change shows the sign of a romantic relationship falling apart. If there is no sex or cold sex, you should consider couple counselling or sex therapy.
Fear Of Communicating With Each Other
When fights go out of proportion or the feeling that your partner won’t understand your concerns leads to fear of communication. It results in couple avoiding the conversation altogether. If a partner is reluctant to bring up specific issues, a licensed therapist can help during the couple’s counselling session to avoid misunderstandings and steer a healthy conversation.
The Unending Resentment
Not resolving past hurts and previous arguments can make your future conversations tainted with previous anger, pain and hurt. Negative feelings can persist for a longer time of period than you think which leads to resentfulness towards your partner. Your way of talking with your partner will hold feelings of guilt, shame, judgment, and insecurities, which will ultimately upset the other partner.
Lack Of Trust
Trust is the foundation of every relationship, a breach of trust can lead to trust issues between the two partners. A lack of trust can make the two partners feel on different sides. A couple should seek emotional support from each other rather than outside the relationship with their friends, coworkers, and family members. When a partner develops a reliance on support outside of their partner, it is an indication to seek a couple’s counselling.
Keeping Secrets From Each Other
A partner should have the right to privacy but there should not be any secrets between a couple. Maintaining secret friendships, undisclosed financial resources, or where you spend your time secretively can be disastrous for any relationship. If you or your partner feels that secrets are being shelved then it’s time to visit a counsellor.
Dishonesty About Finances
Being dishonest about financial information such as purchases, credit card statements, and hidden receipts can lead to breaches of trust within a relationship. It doesn’t take long for big fights to start when a couple cannot agree on how to divide their money.
The Loop Of Unresolved Arguments
Frequent fights and disagreements can make you skip conversations that bottle up your feelings. Rather than avoiding conversations to avoid fights, it is fruitful to cure the fights from the root once and for all. When your arguments seem to repeat themselves without a resolution in sight, it may be a good sign that you and your spouse may need to commit to getting help.
You Want Different Things Out Of Your Relationship
A relationship can work if the two partners can work in sync. Having different thought process or opinions are common but always wanting different things can deteriorate your relationship. A therapist can help you understand if your goals are compatible.