Yet again, another flimsy yet explosive squabble and both of you feel unloved. You are lost at how your relationship ended up like this as you dreadfully wonder ‘Is this over?’. If this feel familiar to you then perhaps your relationship is no longer the same.
Most of us are in denial of relationship breakdown. You know it’s over but you are just dragging it on. For some people, the realisation of the relationship breakdown comes sooner, while others keep dragging on a dead relationship. When love or respect is lost in emotional bonding, it turns unhealthy for the couple. In such a situation, it is better to part ways. But how can one be sure that it is time to walk away from a long term relationship? What are the signs that suggest so?
You feel lost in the relationship
Partners are supposed to uplift and encourage each other. If you see changes in your personality that you don’t like or which are beyond recognition to your own self, then the relationship is clearly toxic for you. In a healthy bonding, partners bring positive and fulfilling changes in each other and not the other way around.
A weird relationship with the ‘ex’ or ‘family or a friend’ or anyone else
If you are constantly having to question your partner’s involvement with other people, especially with an ex, then it is a clear sign of trouble. Not marking your boundaries will make your relationship a triangle and not a mutually respected equation, which it should be. This will lead to causing jealousy and harbouring bitterness. Eventually, it will harm you both. If it is not addressed and resolved even after multiple discussions then it is perhaps time to fold and walk away.
Routine conversations become difficult
Are everyday conversations turning into arguments? Some skirmishes are intrinsic to every relationship. But when routine conversations turn into full-blown conflicts, it results in a lack of comfort with each other. This leads to less communication or non-communication. Not being able to communicate and relate with each other is risky for every relationship. It will result in drifting apart which is always a final blow to an equation.
Attraction towards other people
It is perfectly normal to find other people attractive. But when harmless flirting turns serious, then there is a serious problem brewing. Often thinking or fantasizing about someone else shows that you are losing interest in your significant other. The same goes when you constantly seek company outside your relationship. When you start finding yourself doing this, it is then that the fulfilling purpose of your current relationship is all but lost.
Need for constant justification
There is a difference between offering an explanation and having to justify it. If you are being made to justify every action, it is like telling you that those actions in themselves are unacceptable. Relationships are built on understanding, trust and acceptance. Partners should not have to make efforts to forcibly ‘fit in’ each other’s lives, it should come naturally to both of them.
When there is emotional/physical/verbal abuse
Any form of abuse—physical, mental, emotional, verbal, is a big no! Irrespective of the situation or reason, nothing justifies abuse. None of the partners should accept it or even worse, try to justify it. If there is any incident or sign of any sort of abuse, then it is a clear indicator that the relationship is toxic and it is time for you to walk away. Fast.
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