Taking your stand in relationships is important but so is knowing when to apologise and let go. Check out when and when not you should apologise to your partner!
Relationships are a two-way street and when it comes to resolving issues between couples, communication matters. A lot of relationships fail because of miscommunication or no communication. Be it your anger or happiness you should feel safe to profess both in a relationship. However, at times your anger may be unnecessary and in such moments it is important to extend an apology as well. One might find themselves confused as to when they should be genuinely feeling sorry during a fight with their partner and when they should maintain their stand no matter what.
To help you learn the art of saying sorry at the right time, Team Wedding Affair has compiled a list of advice below-
Say “Sorry” When:
When you violate your relationship terms
One of the most important moments when an apology is a necessity is when you have violated the terms of your relationship. Relationship terms are essentially rules that you and your partner decided to abide by like monogamy and others. Here, you need to apologise to reaffirm your commitment to the relationship and re-discuss the terms if necessary.
When you violate your core beliefs
Every individual has a certain way they aspire to be in life. When they are not able to abide by their core beliefs they may feel disappointed in themselves. In a relationship you may at times say or do something that is against your values and in such a situation you should definitely apologise to your partner. This apology will be as much for you as for them.
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Don’t Say “Sorry” When:
When it’s a habit
If your natural instinct is to apologise at all times, don’t say sorry. Rather than quickly trying to get rid of the guilt, try sitting with your actions and analysing why you did what you did and why it was wrong or hurtful. This makes the instances you apologise much more meaningful and important.
When you don’t mean it
It may be tempting to apologise to our partners just because they think we did something wrong. However, you should never apologise in a relationship if you don’t feel that you are wrong. Apologising after you’ve realised your mistake helps your partner to be able to trust your apology and expect better actions in the future, which is healthy for you both. On the other spectrum, it is also important to not let yourself get pressured into apologising. While you should not apologise to appease yourself you should also not do it for your partner.
Best Way to Communicate Your Apology:
Follow these three simple steps to apologise to your partner in a respectful and considerate manner.
- Try not to cry or seek emotional support while making an apology. The apology is for your partner and you are accountable for your actions to them.
- Own up to your behaviour and shortcomings rather than justifying them with excuses. If you think your action is justifiable for some reason, then an apology is a futile effort.
- Be specific. A generic apology is not what your relationship or partner deserves and thus you should specifically state which of your actions was wrong and the steps you will be taking in the future to rectify it.
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In a relationship, mistakes are bound to happen and apologies will always follow suit. What matters is for you to mean it when you are sorry and not repeat these actions which caused a momentary harm to your relationship.
