There are not one, not two, but five different love languages. Which one is your partner’s?
Love… A word that has hundreds of meanings, an emotion that can be expressed and experienced in hundreds of different ways. In romantic relationships, people receive and express love in different ways. Be it written words or valuable time, our cravings and needs in a relationship differ from one another. This is why it is very important to know about different love languages and how to speak them for a happy and healthy relationship.
There are five different love languages that describe five different ways of expressing love. According to Author and Pastor Gary Chapman, knowing how to use these love languages will help you both feel loved and appreciated in the relationship. The five love languages are – words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service and receiving gifts.
Words of Affirmation
“Words of affirmation” is all about expressing your feelings for someone through words. It can be in the form of spoken words, written letters, simple praise or appreciation. If your partner’s primary love language is “words of affirmation,” they definitely enjoy kind words and encouragement in day-to-day life. Especially from their lover, hearing a compliment or getting a love note can make their day.
How to express: Compliment your partner regularly. Show them your thoughtfulness and attentiveness towards them with verbal communication. Positive comments are a big yes and so are love letters (yes, it is still THE thing.) Whenever they are down, offer them verbal support. Similarly acknowledge their achievements and praise them with whole heart. You don’t have to be a Shakespeare to write to your partner, just be genuine about how you feel and put them in words.
Quality Time
Someone whose primary love language is “quality time” values undivided attention over anything. They feel most loved when their partner spends time with them in meaningful ways without getting distracted. They value doing things together, things that will make their bond stronger than before.
How to express: One of the most common misconceptions of “quality time” is that it means spending time together, while in reality, most couples are just staying in close proximity. To really express your love, you need to put the distraction away, which means turning the phone off, making eye contact and interacting thoughtfully. Going for a walk or planning a date night is ideal to make your partner happy. For someone who values quality time over other love languages, quality conversation is also equally important. So when you are spending time with your partner, put everything aside and actually be there.
Read Also: Setting Realistic Love Standards in Relationships
Physical Touch
If your partner’s primary love language is “physical touch”, they feel love through physical affection. A simple touch can give them goosebumps and make their stomach filled with butterflies. They feel loved when their partner holds their hand or touches their arm. Nothing expresses love better to them than physically interacting with their partner.
How to express: An ideal date for someone with this love language will be simply cuddling on the couch and watching a movie. Hold their hand while walking down the street and give them a massage after a long day of work. This partner needs regular hugs and kisses to feel loved. Like other love languages, “physical touch” also gets misinterpreted. It’s not only about sex. It’s simply about a loving touch that makes your partner feel seen, in private or public.
Acts of Service
One of the most common love languages that can be easily noticed and appreciated is “acts of service”. It simply means doing nice things for your partner to make them feel special. These can be simple things like house chores or cooking food. Someone with this love language is generally a nice person themselves and will do the same for others.
How to express: Do small things for your partner now and then. Cook a meal for them, help with dishes, clean the house or run some errands. These kinds of things show them how attentive you are towards your partner. They feel taken care of and loved by your actions. They will be over the moon if you do things for them without even asking. If they have to ask you for every little thing, they feel like they are “nagging” you and it makes them feel unloved.
Receiving Gifts
Gifts symbolise love and affection for a person with the love language “receiving gifts”. Getting gifts from their lover makes them feel appreciated and cared for. They love to be surprised with small gifts on special occasions as well as day-to-day life.
How to express: Put time and thought into selecting a gift for your partner with this love language. They treasure the memory and thought associated with the present more than the present itself. Remember, your partner is not after the price tag when they say they love receiving gifts. It’s the effort and thought you put into it that makes the gift priceless. Surprise them with their favourite meal, buy them the dress they have been eyeing for long or simply get them a flower and make their day.
Read Also: Small Romantic Gestures That Make a Huge Difference in Love!
These five love languages are just a framework. Spend more time with your partner and observe their actions to know how they feel loved. There can be more than one love language for them, you never know. In the end, everybody wants to be loved.
